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Personal Thoughts

Maybe a bit different, little odd, a whole lot of unique; doing my own thing, enjoying my moments, being happy. Music, singing, playing and productions keep me going, makes it worth it!  My journey as an artist has brought much joy and purpose. My lyrics mantras I use everyday to keep positive and happy. Small steps forward, share light worth the hardships. I have an amazing wife who is supportive and loving. She is a reason I carry on everyday and strive to do as much as I am able to. Disabilities overwhelm, starting over each day coping, doing my best. I do what I can with my limitations. I maintain a positive mental state by seeing the bright side of things. Sharing music, love and light!💙

Favorite colour: orange, blue, black

Birth date/sign: March 17, Pisces metal rooster

Piercings: lip, nose, eyebrow and 5 in each ear

Tattoos: 3, my very first at 16 is on my ankle and is a rose with vines

Self taught joys: cleaning, organizing, self discipline

 

Favorite treat: Mocha Frappe with coconut milk half sweet no whip

 

Relationship status: happily married, thankful for our many wonderful years together

Outlook: making music and creating has brought out the best version of me. Years of therapy, practice and training help me cope and live my best life

Artistic achievements: releasing posts, music and creating productions. Playing, singing, creating and sharing, so awesome, so grateful!

Favorite shows: comedies, scifi, documentaries, nature and animals, shows about inspiring people over coming the challenges in their lives,

Happiest life moments: wedding day and everyday with my wife, getting clean and being in recovery, creating music and productions, being pregnant

Hardest life moments: miscarriage, stopping addictions, depression, self harm and suicide attempts, pain and anxiety overloads

Disabled since: since as far back as I can remember I have had terrible pain in all parts of my body and have suffered with physical, mental, emotional and learning disabilities. Diagnoses began at 10 years old, medication began at 14 years, first with antidepressants then will pain pills and sleeping meds. Followed by over 15 years of aggressive poking, prodding, testing, operations and procedures and countless prescription trials

Medical terms and diagnoses: chronic pain disorder, fibromyalgia, Asthma, chronic migraines/cluster headaches, ibs, vaginismus, Endometriosis, depression, borderline personality disorder, Bulimia, insomnia, anxiety, dyslexic/ learning disabilities

Therapies I find most helpful: retraining my brain with positive thoughts, actions and behaviours - balanced living, water therapy(hot and cold), massage, rocking and swaying - gentle motions, distraction - do something you love, acceptance of what I can not control, stretching, deep breathing, kindness with others, myself and my limitations

Lesbian epiphany: When I was around 10 years olds I started realizing that my crushes were all female. By 14 years old I knew I was not heterosexual. I came out at 17 years old and after many years and experiences, I became comfortable and confident, love myself and be true to who I am.

Dislikes: mean or negative people, giving up, impulsive, destructive, judgemental or angry energy

Religious views: I believe in love and light; doing good and being kind. Tuning positivity and hope with compassion, love and empathy for all

Favorite physical activities: badminton, biking, rollerblading, golfing, walking, playing piano and singing

Favorite video Games: rpgs, driving, strategy

     sharing my experiences and how I cope, give hope. 💙☀️🤗

     You are amazing and you are so very strong. 💜 Be angry, be sad it is all part of the process. 👍 Emotions are wonderful and need to be expressed. (in positive ways hopefully) You’ll find though that anger takes far more energy than sadness. The truth of you choosing to exist in this world let alone with conditions on your life is astonishing. 🤗 I haven’t always been so positive. In fact I used to be very negative and self deprecating. 👹 It was going to kill me through accidental overdose and self loathing. I can’t choose something’s in this life like having Fibro or pain. I can choose how I react to the things this world throws at us. 💩 I got to my darkness point and saw 2 roads ahead; dying through overdose in darkness or drastically changing the negative patterns I had developed. I didn’t want to die, I wanted to find a way to live. ☀️ What I was doing was not working. I had to grow and put effort into being the best me I could be. I had already been the worst to myself. The hardest is reconditioning the mental thoughts to become positive ones. It has become daily practice for my spouse and I to change the tone and pattern of our speech and thoughts from negative to positive. 🌞 Yes it is work, life is just that. You’ll find that after awhile it becomes easier to do. It takes far less energy to be positive and light then to be in darkness and negativity. Way more fun too. 😄

 

     We all have our own unique journeys; we can help one another become the best versions of ourselves. Be good to you, we are beautiful. Keep strong, my friend. 💜☀️🤗

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